Today writer and celebrity Hanger-on Portia MacIntosh is taking over the blog! Portia is a friend and fellow writer from Carina. Her first book ‘Between a Rockstar and a Hard Place” is up for pre-order and will be released February 12th. (Find the buy links underneath the post)
Portia lives a double life! She’s friend and confidante to rock stars, going on tours with them, and partying the way only rock stars can…Can you imagine what she’s seen? And what rock stars really get up to at the after parties and back stage? Her books spill all the things that happen on the road! (I’ve been lucky enough to read her books, and you will LOVE them!)
Then there’s her writing life… she uses a pseudonym to remain anonymous so she doesn’t get kicked out of the inner circle of celebrities if they knew she was using their world for inspiration for her books!
Portia has written a special guest post for us:
A day in the life of a groupie
A day in the life of a groupie… One of the reasons I love life on the road so much is because no two days are the same. When you’re touring with bands you should always expect the unexpected. You will make so many new friends you will give up trying to remember their names, you won’t get much sleep and you’ll end up forgetting more than you actually remember, but it’s always worth it. I use the term groupie for want of a better word, but all I really mean by it is a female friend of the band who tags along for the ride. That’s what I’ve been doing for years, and it’s what inspired me to start writing books, so that I could tell my tour stories anonymously. So, I promised you a day in the life of a groupie, an insight into what it’s like touring with a signed band. What I have written is what you can expect to happen on a day-to-day basis, without any of the drama and unpredictable madness that makes the journey even more exciting. Depending on how far we have to travel, most of the time the wheels on the bus will start turning pretty early in the day. I don’t find the bunks the easiest things to sleep in when the bus is stationary, so I often struggle to sleep on the road. Luckily I am always armed with my ear plugs and my eye mask – necessities, as everyone sleeps at different times, and the awake people often choose to keep entertained with noisy things like PS3s and guitars. Boys will be boys, and so it isn’t unusual for the pranking to start early on in the day if people are bored. These can range from annoying to hilarious to incredibly messy depending on how tired people are and what props are used. The bus always seems to get very messy very quickly. I often find myself taking on the female roles, but I need to be feeling pretty bored and the bus needs to be getting pretty disgusting before I will resort to tidying up after the men. Next, we arrive at the venue. While the crew get busy with unloading and setting up, I go with the band to check out the dressing rooms. Even on the massive sleeper buses the bathroom facilities are not that great, so if you’re not booked into a hotel any time soon then now is the time to wash. The venue will have received the band’s rider in advance, so you can always count on having something awesome (although not necessarily nutritious) to eat. Now officially in the PM, the drinking begins. The next few hours are always a bit of a blur. The tour manager can often be spotted running around and looking stressed as the band members are ushered through the motions. Sound checks, meet and greets and interviews with the press. Sometimes I will watch or, depending on how much sleep I managed to get that morning, I will curl up on a sofa in one of the dressing rooms. With several bands usually playing each date, the dressing rooms can be pretty chaotic, with different people coming and going. This is the part of the day when everyone is tarting up for the gig and updating Twitter and Facebook. Now is the time to charge your phone and your laptop, so everyone is huddled around the plug sockets. At this stage you can expect to see so many semi naked men as the bands are getting ready. This is also about the time people will start snapping selfies, so you either need to dodge the cameras or position yourself in the background of the ones you want catching in. The tour family will all hang out together, and this is usually my favourite time of the day – the calm before the storm! The support bands will go on stage, followed by the headliner. Everyone likes to watch everyone else on stage, so we will often all watch together from the side of the stage. If I have any friends out in the crowd, I will sometimes go out into the audience and enjoy the gig from there. I’m a massive fan of all my band friends, so I will be clapping and screaming just as loudly as everyone else is. After the gig is when the fun really starts. It’s also the hardest part to describe, as no one ever remembers too much about it. The sweaty boys will (usually/hopefully) shower and change their smelly stage clothes. If they have any last professional commitments now is the time to get them out of the way before the partying starts. Where we party depends on where we are. Sometimes we’ll stay at the venue for the after party or sometimes we’ll make it to a club. Being with the band has its perks, so you can expect the alcohol to flow all night. In the small hours of the morning, the band will often resort to take-away food before we all end up back on the bus. Sometimes it’s just us, sometimes the boys will have girls with them… everyone heads to their bunks (or someone else’s). If you’re going to your bunk alone, that’s when the earplugs will come in handy, although nothing can mask the unmistakable rocking when people are up to no good. I try to tell myself I’m on a cruise ship, and let the peaceful rocking of the boat ease me to sleep. Of course, this does not work, but no one has much energy left and soon enough everyone is asleep. Shortly after that the driver will wake up to start the journey and you get to do it all again. It can be exhausting, dramatic and dirty, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
